Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout – Review By Steph, member of Chwaeroniaeth Book Club
The book had me gripped from the first page to the last line.
I found it easy, to immerse myself in Lucy Barton’s voice. There was something in every page that resonated with me. The joy of exploring this story with other book cub members came from discovering perspectives that were similar, different and sometimes quite the opposite of mine.
The two aspects that spoke to me the loudest were: the need to be heard, known, and understood, linked with the need to belong and have...
Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout – Review By Steph, member of Chwaeroniaeth Book Club
The book had me gripped from the first page to the last line.
I found it easy, to immerse myself in Lucy Barton’s voice. There was something in every page that resonated with me. The joy of exploring this story with other book cub members came from discovering perspectives that were similar, different and sometimes quite the opposite of mine.
The two aspects that spoke to me the loudest were: the need to be heard, known, and understood, linked with the need to belong and have a sense of place and purpose – so fundamental to our humanity, and so often fraught with misunderstanding, tension and conflict, as we seek to accept and feel comfortable in our own skins while often needing validation from others to achieve this.
Lucy’s voice is the most authentic I have ever come across that captures this, exploring very sparingly what lies at the heart of being human with all its flaws and frailties, including:
material and emotional deprivation, as well as nurturing and nourishing influences, from our childhood, formative years, and all through (adult) life, power, privilege and entitlement, in our relationships and communication with one another, as well as systemic influences of class, race, religion, gender
“How many times does a person really choose something?...I have thought about this a lot and I would like to know – I really would like to – when does a person actually choose anything?”
Lucy’s story is triggered by the death of her second husband, David (from a Hassidic Jewish community), and the reaching out of her first husband, William (privileged but complex background), as he experiences loss and turmoil.
As Lucy takes us on her journey, one feels this is the opportunity she has been waiting for, and needs, to give voice to her inner dialogue, all the thoughts, feelings, observations largely left unspoken and unheard, the slights, the criticisms, the judgements, the thoughtlessness of others, which she feels so profoundly.
Elizabeth Strout executes this brilliantly with her stripped back, sparing style that reinforces Lucy’s sense of being an imposter, a stranger in your midst, invisible, excluded, never belonging, in her constant quest for “safety” and “authority” . Interestingly, New York gives her this:
“ …a sense of awe and gratitude that this huge, sprawling place had taken me in – had let me live there.” Even this is not unequivocal, she needs permission, she is not entitled.
It is clear she is telling her story at a time of pain and reflection; her narrative conveys so much of the hurt and sadness she has experienced, all the more poignant because she does not invite sympathy, pity. There is little joy.
It is the same – and perhaps even more illuminating – when she shares the few but significant observations and comments made by others. In so doing, I found myself at times questioning my collusion with her subjective experience.
From her reflections, there is so much to dislike about William. And yet, he is Hansel to her Gretel (until he isn’t anymore); he has “authority”, provides her with “safety”. It is through HIS lens we are able to see Lucy in a very different way to the way she sees herself.
The listener is left to filter and interpret Lucy’s personal and subjective account, and I think, invites us to listen with kindness and compassion, as we realise that everyone has a story, only some of which is shared (consciously or not). Much remains hidden, even to ourselves, and so, we should accept that we are flawed and frail: “Whoever really knows the experience of others…We are all mysteries, is what I mean.”
Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout -a review by Liz, member of Chwaeroniaeth book club.
The book gripped me from the beginning. Lucy is a successful novelist, her much loved second husband, David has recently died. Her first husband and father of her children William's third wife has left him and he has recently discovered that he has a half sister still alive living in Maine. Lucy and William set off on a journey to discover more.
The book raises a number of questions on grief, loss, past trauma, poverty, class and authority. It is also a book about the relationships we have with others, what we show of ourselves and who we let in.
The grief Lucy feels on the death of her husband is physical and solitary... the terror of it. It is like sliding down the outside of of a really long building, while nobody sees you.'
This triggers her reflections on the relationships she has had with others, in the main William and his mother, her childhood family but interestingly not with David, is this because the grief is too raw or because he is also an outsider?
The feeling of being an outsider, being invisible, not knowing how to act in different social circles is reinforced throughout her life. 'Lucy comes from nothing' Lucy's not knowing what to do in an hotel while on family holiday. This feeling doesn't go away even with all her success. Is this how we all feel when significant changes have happened in our lives? Canwe truly move within the class system. We can financially but can we emotionally and in the eyes of others is it feasible? Do we leave behind our family and social networks to truly develop new ones or do we carry with us a feeling of not being good enough? Other than fundamental choices of going into higher education or choosing a job/ career what choices do we make in life or do we deal with what is before us?
Is this just a question of class? If we bring in relationships and emotions it becomes far more complex. William clearly privileged and a different class but with a complex childhood also experienced trauma: his discoveries as a teenager and adult of his mother and father' lives have clearly had an impact on him. They also raise the question do we really know another human being, what they are feeling and who they really are?
Do we really understand others views of us, Lucy didn't know what William felt for her even after marriage, her joy, something Lucy didn't consider. William made Lucy feel safe, but he wasn't aware of this.
The language and structure of the novel felt like a conversation with a friend. Elizabeth Strout's descriptions and words were sparse but effective:
We felt that we were perched like birds on a telephone wire in New York City.
The wish never dies.
You never really knew how to pull off a dinner party
William was like my light in the museum, only I had lived my life thinking it was worth something.
I liked the reflective style of the author and will find out about Lucy's journey to Oh William!
Elizabeth Strout and through her, Lucy have raised numerous questions for me about childhood and a child's need for parental love. Poverty and its impact on lives, the poverty of aspiration and the feelings of invisibility. How do we as a society and as individuals help bring about change. Grief, the individuality of it, our inability to share it. How do we support those who grieve?
I have missed not being at bookclub being involved in the various discussions; what's app and emails have been challenging but I'm looking forward to catching up with them all in the next few weeks.
Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout - a review by Jayne, member of Chwaeroniaeth book club.
I really enjoyed this book; it is written in easy language and conversationally, but it has depth and is trying to make sense of the human condition and our relationships. It is written as if you are in the confidante of the protagonist Lucy Barton.
It is a very introspective novel; present day events arouse memories and thoughts of past events as Lucy tries to make sense of her life.
In the present-day Lucy is struggling with the loss of her second husband and the solitude that comes with bereavement. Lucy is in contact with her first husband and father of her 2 adult daughters: William and he calls on her for support firstly as he starts to experience night terrors and then suddenly his wife leaves him as she says he is unreachable, and they embark on a road trip to research news that he has a half sister he has never met.
Lucy begins to ponder on how her marriage failed and poignantly describers how she feels her deprived childhood and isolation from her family led to her break with intimacy with William.
Lucy describes feeling a kind of dissociation that never went away before her wedding day. This break with intimacy never healed, William became less happy and closed in small ways, she could see it happen and their lives sat on top of this.
Lucy tells us that when she gave birth to a girl, William said a boy would have been better and something dropped deep inside her. I like her descriptions as they are deeply meaningful.
Lucy left William eventually as a result of his philandering including with intimate friends of Lucy’s, this split impacted on their daughter who developed anorexia at the time. One of the themes of the book is Lucy’s inner feeling of being invisible but her daughter’s actions made her realise that she is not invisible. All actions by the characters are not judged per se by the author, there is a sense of acceptance and clarity.
The sense of invisibility she supports to her isolated, deprived and abusive childhood, which also meant that she grew up with a sense of doom which still sits inside her and is relatable. Lucy is a successful author, but she does not value herself, she lacks self confidence almost to the point of suffering imposter syndrome.
The author is reflecting that it is not enough to build a new sturdier happy life; to truly inhabit new life you must overcome a damaged childhood version of yourself. We also ponder whether William who does not consider himself invisible is also a damaged childhood version of himself.
Lucy describes her courtship with William, she was drawn to him as he has authority which made her feel protected but when she discovered his affair, she said a tulip stem snapped inside me and never grew back. Lucy describes how William made her feel safe and her reckoning is that she doesn't need him to feel safe anymore now after all this time.
Lucy describes times in her marriage feeling happy which are linked to his mum who they had a close bond with but who judged Lucy from coming from nothing from poverty trash, we later discover this is a contradiction as she was hiding her own childhood of cultural and emotional deprivation.
Lucy tells us that loneliness was the first flavour she tasted in her life, and it is still there, from her uncommunicative father, unloving mother, lack of self-awareness is the driver of this novel, the desire to understand her own choices, in a conversation with William he tells her that we rarely make choices, we just follow we don’t know what we just do.
There are class undertones throughout the novel and the author tells us it is impossible to shake off your roots. Lucy and her second husband are depicted as outsiders; like two birds perched on a telephone wire in New York.
The love for her daughters and their stability is the most positive relationship within the book and she is amazed that they love her. Of course, they love William too and support him and another quote that impacts Lucy is when William describes her as a shining light as she never would describe herself that way.
The road trip that William and Lucy went on together helped her answer her own questions. The book is an Internal dialogue, it illustrates how different people are, how they deal with things, their perspective, how we see ourselves, our perception, she concludes that we are all mysterious.
Oh William! by Elizabeth Strout – Review Heather member of Chwaeronaeth Book Club
This was a lovely read.
Lucy’s voice gently and gradually unfolds into examination of the life of the characters ( her family). Lucy is a divorced and widowed woman reflecting on the emotional and economic poverty of her childhood and how this has shaped her and overshadows her current successful career. Family centres on her ex-husband and their two daughters, and the ongoing, decades long relationship with William and the revelations of his past is the core of the book.
Themes of class, poverty, love, loss, safety, family secrets run through the narrative without judgement. It feels as though Lucy is speaking to the reader.
